Thursday, March 15, 2012

Would you speak up? Tweets from #ididnotreport


Yesterday afternoon I noticed in my Twitter feed that a few people were talking about the tweets under the hashtag #ididnotreport and some anonymous tweets that were retweeted by @ididnotreport1.

As I read through the tweets it was obvious to me that they were coming from various places around the world.  It appears that the crimes of molestation, sexual abuse and rape are still under reported. According to the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN) sexual assault is one of the most under reported crimes.  Statistics show that 60% of assaults are not reported.  Males are least likely to report and they make up 10% of all victims.



It is 2012...and although I probably shouldn't be... I am shocked.

And my heart breaks for these victims.  Sexual violence in all of its forms has to stop.  Now!

Here is a sampling of  anonymous tweets posted by @ididnotreport1:
I didn't make corrections or censor any post.  


Tweets 
#ididnotreport because I was a child and had no idea what to say

@Ididnotreport1 to the anonymous who blames themselves for any future attacks for not reporting - only the attacker is to blame. Not you.

So many adults failed me as a child. Looking back there were so many clues that I was being molested. #ididnotreport

#ididnotreport our PE teacher comin gin to the changing rooms and expecting us to continue changing while he watched. Aged 15.

#ididnotreport the boy who hit me in the face at a school disco because I didn't want to kiss him.

@Ididnotreport1 ...not saying anything did not mean I was responsible for anything that happened after, it was ALL his fault, HIS hands xxx

 #ididnotreport when a worker in my childrens home offered me £25 to watch me in the bath, because I was already in trouble for other stuff

#ididnotreport when I woke up with him on top of me, I'd drank a lot that night & was afraid it was my fault & no one would help.

#ididnotreport that my friends boyfriend held me down and pushed my legs open and when she came in he said I tried it on. She believed him.

@Ididnotreport1 please know that was not your fault, same happened to me with childhood abuse, took a long time for me to realise that by...

 #ididnotreport that I had sex with a boy I fancied in the back of a car while his friends sat in front and I didnt really want to. age14

#ididnotreport that my mum's friend gave me £1 for sweets as he stroked my thigh,told me not tell mum. I never spent the money or told. Age7

...regret that #ididnotreport. I'm filled with guilt cuz my fear kept me from stopping him from raping someone else. Their blood, my hands

#ididnotreport because he was my boyfriend, my "best friends" didn't believe me, & I got preg from it. My son's a blessing but still regret

#ididnotreport my babysitter because I didn't understand, I thought I would get into trouble

I woke up in a strange place with him on top of me, I said stop, stop #ididnotreport b/c how do you report a crime you barely remember

#ididnotreport my kindergarden friend's older brother who made me perform oral sex & had intercourse w/ me.

#ididnotreport because I was a child, I didn't understand and by the time I did it was too late

#ididnotreport parents & relatives taking photos of us 5 - 7 year olds flashing our knickers - we thought it was funny at the time (80's)

Christ I wish I were surprised by anything from @Ididnotreport1 #ididnotreport

#ididnotreport it was happening in a public bus, I was in HS, n didn't realize it was a molestation. A nice man helped, offered me a seat...

#ididnotreport because it was technically not a rape. No penetration whatsoever, n I didn't understand that it was molestation at that time

#ididnotreport my friend's father & uncle who were also my bosses in a shop, when they regularly passed comment on my breast size. I was 16.

@Ididnotreport1 because I blamed myself.

#ididnotreport my best friend's brother who pulled me to the ground putting his hand down my pants in their house- he was 14 and I was 15

#ididnotreport. I DID report but felt guilty because it was never penetration, he never hurt me, and others had it much worse. I was 12-14.

#ididnotreport the stranger who chatted me up for a few minutes before leaning in and biting my face

#ididnotreport [italian villa cont.] He's a teacher. I was 20.

#ididnotreport the gang of men who asked me for directions on quiet Belfast street at night then made lewd comments

a scientist from NY(2009) - would not accept a no, sexual coercion, attempted rape, verbal/emotional abuse

because the people I told first didn't seem to understand that I didn't really agree to what he wanted me to do.

#ididnotreport. Didn't know it was wrong if I consented. Embarassd 2 say no & just wanted 2 be liked. I was 14. Angers & Grosses me out now.

#ididnotreport Family friend on Italian villa holiday who looked at me funny & stood outside my bedroom door heavy-breathing & masturbating.

#ididnotreport the uncle of my friend who slapped my ass before commenting on my "good birthing hips". 10+ people just laughed. I was 16.

because it was in a huge crowd. I didn't really believe that could happen or that anyone would believe he groped me

#ididnotreport the guy on a crowded train rubbing his member against me, cos I kinda liked it- does that mean I was asking4it (2go further?)

#ididnotreport because I couldn't remember enough of what had happened as I was passed out, other than I could not have given consent!

#ididnotreport because i'd slept with him before & i knew people would blame me as I had been out drinking

#ididnotreport because I was cold and stuck in the wrong part of London -he said I could stay at his til morning, but all he wanted.. *sigh*

I did not report because I did not speak the local language. And 'nice' girls aren't drunk on a Tuesday night...

because I wasn't allowed a boyfriend. Telling that he assaulted me would mean getting in trouble for him existing in the first place.

If you or someone you know is currently being violated  SPEAK UP... Make a report. 

Or if you suffer with emotional and spiritual wounds
of past sexual violence please talk with someone you trust.

Don't let another day go by without getting the help and support that you deserve.

7 comments:

  1. So so sad..may God heal and redeem these peoples' lives.

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  2. Alida, thank you for bringing this to attention!

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  3. It's such an insidious part of our society that affects so many! Thanks for shinning a light on these issues Alida!!

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  4. Praying for strength and healing for those who have been affected that they will have the courage to speak out and seek help. And if they are unable to speak...that we may have the courage and be their voice.

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  5. I saw this from your Twitter feed. It breaks my heart!

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  6. and I feel I must add because it takes so much of my husbands' time (he's a police officer in violent crimes) away from REAL cases.....if you are feeling spiteful or vengeful towards a guy: don't make a false report. just don't do that. It may be surprising to many that a girl/woman would make such a story up, but it does happen. and when it does, it is such a diservice to all the actual victims out there dealing with such trauma. You dishonour them in making false claims. Cops like my husband are pulled away from real cases to work your false claim - which means an abuser, or rapist goes free another day. is allowed more time to practice and perfect their horrible crime.

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